(no subject)

[salaryman]

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[disasdeer]

That's not something you thank people for, Nanami-san.

[ Hm. ]

Ah. Is that the case? That's very fortunate.

I didn't transform this time, I think I may have escaped lucky for now. Though I think I should anticipate next time will be much worse, if I'm not careful.

[salaryman]

Why not?

[ Hmph. ]

I agree that it is quite fortunate. If I did anything to harm anyone, I would see no reason why I should not be put down like some renegade regardless of the reason.

[ Nanami can say that because he is a Grade 1 Sorcerer; the amount of damage that he could do cannot be dismissed. ]

Please do. I would not want anything to happen to you, Louis-kun.

[disasdeer]

I understand it's a normal thing to do when you like a person.

[ Ah - ]

I don't think people here are keen to put down someone who has gone feral because most understand it is outside of someone's control. But certainly doing what you can to slow down someone is an option.

You're a pretty thoughtful person, Nanami-san.

[salaryman]

Even so, the concern should not be met with nothing.

[ Hmph. ]

Even if it is outside of their control, if I am a danger to someone, I would like to be dealt with rather than treated mercifully. Keep that in mind. I would hope nothing like that happens in the future, but just in case.

I only do what I believe is correct.

[disasdeer]

I don't know. Maybe.

[ It's not like he has a lot of friendships or...general positive relationships with others to even back up the claims he's making, so - he'll just assume that Nanami has more experience. ]

I understand, though. It says a lot about you.

[salaryman]

Maybe?

[ Explain that, deer. ]

Does it?

[ Is he being perceived? He isn't sure how he feels about that. ]

[disasdeer]

Maybe. As in, I don't think it's right but I don't have any evidence to prove you otherwise.

[ He needs a little more experience. ]

That's maybe.

And it tells me that you'd rather sacrifice yourself than be a danger to others. It means you're a good person.

[salaryman]

At least, you know not to attempt to launch into any half-formed arguments.

[ Congrats. ]

I am not a good person. I am merely someone who is doing something "good."

[disasdeer]

Just one something good?

Or several somethings?

I think the distinction between a good person and someone who does a good deed or two is intent, which only you can truly know.

I've known more bad than good, and I still think you're a good person.

Despite your protests.

You can't change my mind, so don't bother trying.

[salaryman]

You're setting yourself up to be disappointed, Louis-kun.

[ Another sigh. ]

But it isn't up to me to protect you from that, I suppose.

[disasdeer]

Hey, at least it was a nice idea while it lasted.

[salaryman]

It was.

Now... have you reflected on your mistakes?

[disasdeer]

Sometimes. I try not to focus on them for long, though.

I'd rather not spend time reflecting on them long enough to convince myself they were mistakes instead of choices that I had to make.

I can't undo them, after all.

[salaryman]

A person can convince themselves that everything was rational and correct, but that's wrong, Louis-kun.

Reflecting on one's actions and ensuring that the same mistake does not happen in the future is something we must do, if not for other's sake then our own.

[disasdeer]

That's the thing, Nanami-san.

They weren't always made because they were rational, but I still wouldn't say they're mistakes.

If I was the same person who always looked back. I guarantee you that I wouldn't be speaking with you now. I'd be dead or eaten.

I have to look to what I can do in the future because the past is gone.

[salaryman]

Is that so?

[ someone who has to keep moving forward. truly, it is just like a deer. whatever missteps that have been taken, they do not matter because he is still alive now. that sort of mentality, he can't say that it is a "good" one, but louis is still alive and seems determined to keep living.

it is more than just existing, as nanami views himself as doing. perhaps, the truth of how louis lives isn't ideal or "right," but it is a truth that the young deer lives and can exist peacefully in. as such, he has nothing more that he needs to say on the subject. ]

My mistake, then. I apologize for speaking out of turn.