(no subject)

[salaryman]

« nanami.kento » TEXT ✧ AUDIO ✧ VIDEO ✧ ACTION KENTO NANAMI ✦ JUJUTSU KAISEN
RESIDENCE ✦ Residency
GEMBOND ✦ Emerald Greeting, this is Nanami Kento's voice mail. I am unavailable. Please leave a short message and I will get back to you. Thank you.

INFO ✧ PERMISSIONS

Comments

((OK GOOD!!))

[partymagician]

Mm, that's part of it.

[ Sharing meals with someone is nice. Before Nanami had moved in, Fai had gotten pretty lonely having most of his meals alone. He'd gotten so used to sharing them with his companions that he hadn't realized how much he would end up missing it.

Fai tilts his head a little. ]

Only meals?

[salaryman]

Only meals.

[ As though to make a point, he takes a deep drink of his coffee. His eyes close as he does so, like he is not allowing any complaint.

He refuses to see it, so there will be none. ]

That is more than enough for me.

[partymagician]

[ Sorry, Nanami. He has complaints.

Fai sets his own slice of cake down, crossing his arms as he tilts his head. ]

Hmmm... I'm afraid I can't do that, Nanami.

[ He's dropped the nickname too, which means he's serious about this. ]

I consider you a friend. It's inevitable that I'll think of you in other times too, like when I see a book I think you might enjoy.

[ While they are roommates, he can't help but consider Nanami his friend too. Since Fai isn't used to having friends, he takes this seriously. ]

[salaryman]

[ He looks over the coffee cup, staring hard at Fai. ]

We are friends, and I am telling you that you do not need to do that for me.

[ Nanami realizes that he is going too far in his desires to not be "seen" by other people. Back home, he did not fuss that much when someone got him something. It was rare when it happened, and he would only tell them that they should spend their money a little wiser, but still accept the gift.

He also does not know how long he will be in this world; he does not know what will happen. His desire to fulfill his duty to others runs hotter than usual. He does not want to do anything to burden them; he doesn't want to do anything to have them remember him if he should fade one way or another. ]

Can you do that for me as my friend?

[partymagician]

[ He doesn't need to, but he wants to. Little things like that is how Fai shows that he cares. ]

No.

[ There's a slight frown on his face. Nanami doesn't think he's worth that kind of thought, right? That's what Fai has garnered from that conversation they had at the bonfire.

Hm. ]

You're worried that you're troubling me if I think about you, right? Asking me not to troubles me more.

[salaryman]

Eventually, it will come to trouble you.

[ It is why he attempts to remain firm and steadfast; it is why he puts so much effort in being a solid foundation for others and not seek out any comfort or relief for himself. His duty to others comes before his own well-being, and he's fine with that. ]

Why would it trouble you more?

[partymagician]

I don't have many people I care about, so I like to do things to show that I care. Thinking of them is one of those things. That's why it would trouble me more.

[ He's also weak—he cares too much about other people, despite his best interests. ]

Maybe I'll regret that later, maybe I won't. It's hard to say, especially in a place like this.

[salaryman]

You'll regret it.

[ Nanami can say that for him; he does not think it is right to dictate someone's feelings, but he does not want to cause Fai anymore pain than what the man is already carrying. ]

You will regret it and I will become a curse to you. I don't want to do that to you, Mister Fai.

[partymagician]

[ Fai shakes his head. ]

I'm already cursed, Nanamin. You can't give me a greater curse than the one I already have.

[ He alluded to it before, but never really delved into it. But, he's telling the truth. What he has now is worse. ]

[salaryman]

Do you think that makes me happy?

[ He is going to set everything down on the counter. It's not roughly set down, as he cares about the items that they have in the apartment. There is no reason to make a show of anger that damages something that both of them have some sentimentality for. ]

Big or small, I do not wish to curse you.

[partymagician]

[ Fai glances toward the floor. It probably doesn't make Nanami happy, and that's evident in the way he sets everything down.

He's serious—more than he usually is. ]

You won't. I know what a curse feels like, and nything lesser than what I already have isn't a true curse to me.

[ That's how he sees it, at least. ]

I don't think you're capable of even becoming a curse to me.

[ Because he has had someone become a curse to him before. Fai can't see Nanami ever reaching that level. ]

[salaryman]

Whether or not you recognize it is hardly the issue.

[ It is then that Nanami wonders if he has the capability of exorcising the curse that is on Fai. He is willing to admit that it is something out of his capabilities, as well. The curse did not originate in his world, and may not be something he can handle, but -- ]

Don't say that. While alive we cannot create curses, we are capable of it at the moment of our deaths.

[ But he returns to his original thought. ]

Then, I shall ensure that you will not want to be cursed by me ... by attempting to exorcise the curse that you are under.

[partymagician]

[ Fai shakes his head, his mind immediately going back to when he was cursed. What would Fei Wang Reed do if he found out someone exorcised that curse? He would probably curse Nanami tenfold, if not outright kill him. ]

No. Don't try. Please.

[ He exhales, belatedly realizing that it comes out a little shaky. He hates talking about it, but he should probably tell Nanami why he doesn't want that. ]

I should have told you since we're living together, but I'm a magician. Or a mage or sorcerer... whatever they're called in your world. [ He looks away, down at the floor. ] I'm cursed to kill the first person I come across that's more powerful than me.

[ And he has no idea if that curse even works here, or if it applies to anyone in this world at all. ]

The only way to end it is for it to be activated.

[salaryman]

[ He opens his mouth like he might protest but the manner in which Fai speaks stops him. His shoulders drop just slightly before he straightens his posture; his lips press into a thin, worried line. ]

If you did not feel comfortable telling me these things, it is nothing to feel sorry or guilty for, Mister Fai. [ Nanami feels like saying that to him, and letting him know that he holds not ill will about it.

But he pauses at hearing what he's been cursed with. How cruel. Isn't that cursing a person to die in such a roundabout and terrible manner? He wants to ask why he was cursed like this, but can only assume the individual is simply an evil person.

There are those that have deep and complex reasons for doing things, he can admit that much, and there are those he doesn't care to understand or sympathize with regardless of their reasons.

Because he, too, can be cruel when he wishes to be. ]

I see. [ He hesitates for a moment before reaching out to place his hand on Fai's shoulder, gripping it lightly. A sigh slips past his lips -- a wave of frustration can be felt in his emotions -- before he pulls him forward into a quick embrace.

Sympathy for his plight, reluctant resignation in accepting Fai will care for him as he already decides to care for the mage, and a burning fury for the person that cursed him -- all these emotions felt as he holds him. ]

[partymagician]

[ He looks at Nanami properly, surprised to hear that he doesn't care that Fai kept something like that from him. His immediate reaction is to ask him if that's really okay, if he should be hiding the fact that he's potentially dangerous. Somehow, though, he thinks Nanami would still insist that he shouldn't feel guilty or apologetic about it.

That hand on his shoulder makes him smile a little, and he's about to tell Nanami that he doesn't need to comfort him, but then he pulls Fai into a hug. Immediately, his eyes widen and those emotions—sympathy, resignation, and fury—are practically radiating from Nanami through their bond. It's almost overwhelming, and without even realizing it, Fai's arms wrap around Nanami in return, tight and almost desperate.

He... didn't realize how badly he needed a hug, and it's all hitting him now. Maybe it was meant to be quick, but Fai doesn't want to let go just yet. ]

[salaryman]

[ Nanami is a person that does not hug people easily; he keeps to his own space and people respect the boundaries that he sets for himself. But he cannot listen to Fai's situation, to all the implications of what the curse he has been given means, and not respond in some way.

His hold tightens around him, and he dips his head down to rest it softly against the man's head. He isn't able to get his feelings to settle -- they remain the same blend of emotions, but there is a sense of relief that Fai is willing to let himself be comforted. ]

It may be too simplistic and cruel for me to say, but... you did not do anything wrong. [ Yes. It is too easy and too brutal a statement for him to make; he's someone uninvolved and does not know the full story. But still, he did admit to himself that he can be cruel at times. ]

[partymagician]

I... You would probably change your mind if you knew.

[ Fai's own emotions are mixed up too—a cocktail of frustration with himself, grief, and sadness that Nanami can probably feel.

Fai squeezes him tighter, burying his face in Nanami's neck. ]

But... I want to believe what you said for now.

[ The truth is, no one has ever said that to him before. It's a relief to hear, even if he's sure Nanami would change his mind. ]

[salaryman]

[ Nanami sees no reason to lie and say that he would not change his mind if he knew the truth. It may be that whatever truly happened may be Fai's fault in some way, but he goes over what was shared before -- and he refuses to believe that he will change his mind.

Even if it is an inconvenient truth, he does not desire to damn one person who has already been dragged down so far. He also sees no reason to do that, and Fai is someone who still reaches out to help and care for others.

And so he can firmly say: ]

I won't. I will not change my mind.

[partymagician]

[ He knows there's no point in refuting what Nanami says, because he'll just reiterate that his mind won't change, so Fai stays quiet. His hold on Nanami momentarily tightens before loosening as Fai practically slumps against him. ]

...Thank you.

[ It's quiet, just barely loud enough for Nanami to hear. ]

I didn't realize how much I needed to hear something like that.

[ He laughs softly, mildly surprised that he admitted that. Then again, Nanami knows a lot more about him know, so there's no reason to hide these things. ]

[salaryman]

You're welcome.

[ He does want to argue about being thanked; he doesn't believe what he has said deserves it. In truth, it is something that Fai should have heard from others long ago. It should have been heard as soon as he was cursed in the first place.

"It wasn't your fault. You didn't do anything wrong."

His arms tighten around him yet again before relaxing. The anger he feels flares just a little bit more before it settles. Not much shows on his face, but that's fine; the two of them are this close and so he does not need to hide his emotions. ]

I shall say them whenever you are feeling like you are unworthy of them. [ A beat. ] So you don't forget the truth of what I said.

[ There are many truths in the world; this is the truth that he decides to live in, and would like Fai to live in it, as well. ]

[partymagician]

[ He smiles softly to himself, even as he feels that flash of anger. It's probably at whoever cursed him, isn't it? Fai bites back a comment that being angry on his behalf isn't worth it. ]

I'll try not to.

[ Fai can't promise that he'll view Nanami's words as truth, but he can promise to try. That's all he can do.

He steps away once Nanami's hold on him relaxes. It seems like he's going to fully disengage for a moment before Fai pulls on Nanami's collar to bring him closer again. His grip isn't strong and one that Nanami could easily wrangle himself out of, but Fai would like to think he wouldn't. Since Nanami is an inch or two taller, he tugs on it a little to bring him down so he can give him a kiss on the cheek.

It's another thanks—more affectionate than the previous one and one Nanami doesn't have to hear uttered. ]

[salaryman]

[ He lets his arms start to drop away until Fai pulls him down. It isn't necessarily insisting as it is just asking. Nanami doesn't pull himself back but lets himself be brought down closer to his level. There is mild curiosity felt in their connection -- What are you doing?

His eyebrows lift at the soft kiss on his cheek. He feels the thanks that is given, and there is resigned gratitude for being thanked. Though, he would say that there is nothing that he needs to be thanked for. Still, he tells himself yet again that there are times when he need not be so much himself.

Nanami lets out a small sigh as he rests his hands on either side of Fai's face and sets his forehead lightly against the mage's. It's all right. I'll be at and on your side for as long as I am here. ]

[partymagician]

[ He feels safe.

It's a strange feeling, and he can't remember the last time he felt it. It's... surprisingly nice. One of his hands goes up to rest over Nanami's as he lets out a small sigh, letting himself bask in this feeling.

But, he also finds his gaze drifting to Nanami's lips, and the grip he still has on his collar tightens a little. ]

Hey, Nana-pon. Can I...?

[ He feels like he doesn't necessarily need to finish the rest of that question, but his heart still beats at the thought of it despite himself. ]

[salaryman]

[ Nanami thinks that it might be wise to tell him "no." His own desire to not be perceived or worried about comes up, again, but he also feels how Fai does. This quiet moment does make him feel safe and comfortable, as well.

It is one that comes from being able to protect someone's heart even a little. ]

It's fine.

[ His voice involuntarily softens as he answers him. ]

[partymagician]

[ It probably would be a good idea not to do this, but then again, Fai doesn't avoid things because they're a bad idea.

So, he shifts just a little so he can press his lips against Nanami's. It's a soft kiss, and Fai keeps it chaste, wanting to gauge Nanami's reaction before he does anything more. Despite that, however, a simple kiss like this feels intense.

Sharing a stronger bond with someone really does make a difference, and Fai is feeling that right now. ]